About the Author
Dr. Alan Wolfelt is a speaker, grief counselor, and Director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition. He is the author of Understanding Your Grief, The Depression of Grief, and The Paradoxes of Mourning. He lives in Fort Collins, Colorado.
Product Description
After a loved one dies, each day can be a struggle. But each day, you can also find comfort and understanding in this daily companion. With one brief entry for every day of the calendar year, this little book by beloved grief counselor Dr. Alan Wolfelt offers small, one-day-at-a-time doses of guidance and healing. Each entry includes an inspiring or soothing quote followed by a short discussion of the day’s theme. This compassionate gem of a book will accompany you.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Grief One Day at a Time
365 Meditations to Help You Heal After Loss
By Alan D. Wolfelt Center for Loss and Life TransitionCopyright © 2016 Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-61722-238-2
CHAPTER 1
JANUARY 1
"At the rising of the sun and at its going down, We remember them.
At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter, We remember them.
At the opening of buds and in the rebirth of spring, We remember them.
At the rustling of leaves and in the beauty of autumn, We remember them.
In the beginning of the year and when it ends, We remember them.
So long as we live, they too shall live for they are now a part of us as We remember them."
— Excerpt, by Sylvan Kamens and Rabbi Jack Riemer
At this transition from the old year to the new, we think about those we love who have died. A year they will not enjoy. A year they will not be here for us. A year — at once so swift and so excruciatingly slow.
But in this new year, we will remember them, and we will love them. And those are the two most powerful forces in the universe.
* * *
This year, I will remember, and I will love.
JANUARY 2
"And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been."
— Rainer Maria Rilke
We who grieve may not exactly feel like celebrating the new year, but we can sometimes feel a bit of relief that the last calendar year — which was rough — is over.
The new year holds the promise of a clean slate. It offers opportunities for new beginnings. It whispers of hope.
Let us welcome hope whenever and wherever and whyever we feel it stir. And as we slog forward into this new year, let us try to remember that it will be full of things that have never been. It will lack special people, yes, but it will also bring surprises — gifts, joys, love, and, if we continue to do our hard work of active mourning, a measure of healing.
* * *
I can both mourn and expect good things to happen in this new year.
JANUARY 3
"On this bald hill the new year hones its edge.
Faceless and pale as china The round sky goes on minding its business.
Your absence is inconspicuous; Nobody can tell what I lack."
— Sylvia Plath
Part of what makes grief so hard is that it's invisible. Inside we are torn apart, but outside we look basically the same. Nobody can tell what we lack — sometimes not even the people who are closest to us.
In times gone by, mourners wore black clothing or special jewelry to alert others to their grief. We too can wear a symbol of our loss, such as an armband, a photo button, or, as we do here at the Center for Loss, an "Under Reconstruction" pin. Or we can simply make it a point to be forthcoming with the people in our lives, letting them know what happened and sharing our current thoughts and feelings. We can appropriately communicate our lack.
* * *
When others ask me how I am doing, I will not say, "fine" unless I am truly fine. Instead, I will learn to share my inner reality so that I am living and communicating my truth.
JANUARY 4
"Nothing makes a room feel emptier than wanting somebody in it."
— Author Unknown
Oh, the pain of missing those who have died. The memories are there, the love is still there, but the physical pre
